Letters To You
by gurt
Summary: Rory writes Jess a letter. Jess decides to show up in Stars Hollow after another absense from his dad. Perhaps her words will be eaten or perhaps she might have the courage to confront him. [RJ - Please read and review]
1. The Letter

--**The Letter**--  
  
Dearest Jess -   
  
It is two a.m. as I write this. At this time, it's probably when I'm awake the most, thinking. If I were to be thinking about you, would I be betraying the barrier I had created after you left? I hate thinking of you. It makes me happy and terribly sad at the same time. I could've fallen in love with you. I think, at some point, at some times, I did. I was in love with you, but I don't think you know what the meaning of love is. You may love Luke in a fatherly way, or your mother in a respective sense, but you never took the time to learn when you were with me. That's okay, because now that you're gone, it's okay. You can say things in letters that you would never say face to face, and I hope to God, I don't have to see your face again, because not saying goodbye was one thing, but welcoming you back is another.  
  
I think I'm happy now. Mom's good, not that you would ask. Maybe it's better we didn't work out, I love my mother but she hates you, I think that's fair.   
  
Luke's good, not that you would ask. He wasn't over the moon about your leaving, but he didn't seem crushed about it. I do think all things happen for a reason, whether the person chooses it or not, you left and I'm okay. People move on. You disturbed the town's peace, stole a few gnomes, crashed my car, and faked a murder outside of Doose's, but you know what, Jess? People didn't like you then and they don't like you now. I don't mean to blunt, but seeing how the only thing you did that I benefited from was give me a couple of fun months and a Distillers ticket I wouldn't call what we had something to put in the Stars Hollow Hall of Fame. If that's all your James Dean masquerade accomplished you should be pretty darn disappointed.  
  
Perhaps venting out my feelings on paper doesn't give you the same effect, so picture me yelling at you. Got that? Let's move on. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for working so hard at our relationship, and waiting for you and hoping that you would call and tell me you made a big mistake and you want to come home. Home being Stars Hollow. Jess, I hope that you're sorry too, because if you aren't there is no need for this letter to continue.  
  
I hope that you know who it is by now and if you don't I can only imagine that your drunk or you just have an extremely bad memory -   
  
Rory   
  
p.s. If you reply you better have a very good argument.   
  
[That's the end of that chapter. Er ... literally. I'm still on the verge of deciding if I want to make this into a story or just a one-piece. Do you think this could evolve into something more or is this pretty much self-explanatory? Please tell me ... in your review! Ha! Got you there. Right and one note: I live in Australia and we are only up to episode 16 of Season Three (Gilmore buffs out there? Episode title?) so, I will be not fully updated with the continuing saga of the girls like you lucky Americans. So, if I make a mistake or something along those lines, bare with me. I'm one step away from suing the channel that screens the show on a Saturday. Don't they think we have lives? Well, we don't but still ...   
  
And now I will go. Review please! --  
  
gurt] 


	2. Returning The Favor

--**Returning The Favor**--  
  
Dearest Rory -  
  
Now, let's get this out of the way. I'm sorry. If I sound insensitive, I'm sorry. If I made you fall in love with me, I'm sorry. If I made you hate me, I'm sorry. If I made you miss me, Rory, I'm sorry. I'm the dumbest guy alive, but I had to know. To know what it'd be like to have a dad, to share a game of catch, to talk about the girl down the street, to feel fatherly love from someone other than a diner owner. I did learn that, Rory, and I learnt something else too. Don't trust the guy who walked out of your family. Because two nights ago, at three a.m. I walked in my father's room to find everything gone. The bed was stripped and the closet was bare, because a son wasn't what Jimmy Mariano wanted. A life was what Jimmy Mariano wanted. That's what he's got now, his son's on a bus. He's free, but I'm sorry to say, Rory, you're not.  
  
I'm coming home. Home is your home. My temporary home. I realize I'm a jackass, and I realize that I'm the last person you want to see, but I'm being selfish and I need to see you. You're the thing that made me great at some point. One point. You're a beautiful person and I think I need something to remind me that things aren't always as screwed up as they're meant to be.  
  
As I write this, I sit in the back corner of a bus. My bag under my feet, my head against the seat. I'm telling you this because I want you to picture me. Before I step in and disturb your life. This may not prepare you, because I do not plan on sending this letter. I just need to feel better about myself for a minute, please, bare with me. I need to apologize and get my feelings out in the open. It makes me feel like an actual human being. That's rare. You probably remember me being as easy to read as a Tolstoy classic. You know I love it.  
  
I'll say goodbye for now, and hope to see you in the future. The near future, because as I say a quick goodbye I see the Welcome to Stars Hollow sign. This town is too cheery, but deep down ... I know that the cheeriness will fade once I step back in town.  
  
Sincerely -   
  
Jess   
  
[Right after this chapter -- which hopefully will be updated soon -- the story will be set in a normal story format. Letters will featured again, but not as often as normal chapters. Hope you enjoyed this one, however! This is setting the ground work for the story I have to come. Please review! Will be mucho appreciated. All right, I'll leave you alone now.  
  
And now I will go! Review!   
  
- gurt] 


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